Jenae’s post from the other day made me remember how much I enjoyed living alone – and made me sad she’s not going to give it a shot.
When I very first moved to Arizona, I had a 2 bedroom apartment all to myself. And it was magical.
I wish I had pictures to show y’all, but a) most of you were there at least once, and b) they are all packed up anyway.
My parents helped me find it, and also helped me pay for it for the first few months. Which was really generous. I moved in August 2002. The area was not the best, but I never really felt unsafe. There was a crazy ex-cop who managed the place, plus a single girl lived next door. Safe as safe can be.
Started school middle of August.
Lazed around the house by myself for about 2 months.
My classes were in the afternoon, so I spent my mornings doing homework and watching The Today Show.
Started working 32 hours/week mid-October. And, miracle-of-Arizona-miracles, I was able to support myself on those 32 hours/week. My parents didn’t help me with rent after that November, I think.
That would never happen in CA.
January Andrew moved to AZ and we lived happily ever after.
Eventually.
He, too, got an apt all by himself and LOVED it. He loved his little itty bitty bachelor pad. He loved watching movies whenever he wanted, and falling asleep in the living room. (I should get him to blog about it).
Over the next year and a half, I had 3 different roommates for a total of 7 or 8 months. Including Kaitlin. Who was my roommate for about 4 weeks. 3 of which she spent in CA. But that’s another story.
I made friends at our church who came over all the time. We all had cheap cheap cheap food together, played Nintendo, watched movies.
I lived close to work and closer to school. I lived a short drive away from Andrew’s and shorter drive away from the Haugens (where Sharon and I had a standing afternoon date every other week for me to come over and do laundry).
I ended up moving in with my parents in June 2004, because they moved back to AZ, and I knew A&I would be getting married soon and could save use the $. But it made me sad. Still does. I almost wish I had stayed there, put up with saving less $, and Andrew and I could have lived there when we were first married. …. oh well.
Living alone really made me become more competent. Sure, I had friends (mostly Andrew) who were around to help me. But I had to learn to ask for help. Ex. Someone to pick me up from work cause my car was in the shop. I had to learn to shop for and cook for myself. On a budget. Which is not easy (a lot of pasta and bean burritos). I had to learn to manage my time between full-time school, almost full-time work AND keeping my home inhabitable.
I love Andrew, you all know that. But I think each of us moving out of our parents’ houses and living alone for at least 2 years really REALLY helped us grow up, and become responsible adults (you all may debate the validity of that statement in the comments). I am so thankful that I had the opportunity and the means to do that.
And I may insist my kids do the same.
I wont move back out on my own because I can’t afford it, because no one helps me. and no one has since I was 16. And I have car payments, and cell phone payments, and car insurance payments. I wish I could, but financially I would totally fail and end up in debt. I really miss it though, but I am wise enough not to rush out and move on my own until I can support myself.
I agree, although after reading Jenae’s post I feel for her, and definitely understand why she’s back at her mom’s. I lived on my own for a year and a half, and it definitely made me more mature. It also proved to me that everyone who told me “the best way to ruin a friendship is to become roommates” was right. But I learned I was okay by myself. I will definitely encourage my kids to do the same.
I’m so glad you were able to have that experience and that Arizona costs were reasonable enough to do it. I don’t know how anyone does it in CA without a LOT of roommates or a really awesome job. It’s a great learning and growing experience and definitely the best plan before getting married.
I lived on my own for about 6 months or so when I was around 18before I moved back home to save for our wedding too. I lived with 2 roommates and we all got engaged about the same time, so decided to move back home.
I also lived practically on my own when I was 15 years old in Ohio. That’s when my mom and dad were separated and I stayed in Vermilion with my dad for almost a year. He wasn’t much of an involved parent and pretty much let me do whatever I wanted. Didn’t ask or check on me at all.
I’m so thankful that I had just become a Christian, because who knows what I would have been doing if I wasn’t.
I agree with you Amy… living on your own is such a growing, learning experience. I loved that Miranda had that year and a half on her own… and now she will be stretched even more, now that she has her first roommate.
Every roommate I ever had totally prepared me for my future husband.
Love the look of your new blog!
I just realized I never really lived alone. I lived in a dorm with my own room but that was the closest I got to alone. Maybe I should move out and try it.